Fer New Years after a hard year, I decided on the KISS principle, which translated from English to Texan is basically Less Is More, Dummy (LMD). So the menu started with fresh Appaloosa Beans (blackeyeds) of course, but what gonna go wid dat, like would be said by a Cajun? Aha said he, why pig it’d be, or doesn’t the Pope look like a Polaris Missle? Darn right.
So jumped into the Batmoble, roared over to Costco, and dropped anchor. I approached the door in stride with purpose, clerks scattering like chickens out in front of a ‘59 Ford flatbed with no brakes and no intent to experiment with using ‘em. On back to the meat counter in the back and beat on the window. Pimply faced apprentice butcher sticks his face out.
“Whaddya want?” He sneers.
“Pork bellies, I sez, or you hung up by the toes at Judge Parker’s convenience, which’ll it be?”.
He peers out behind his submarine window glasses, blinks like one of those bug eyed goldfish in a pet store bowl.
“Three cases down old timer” he says.
Really...
“You ever seen a man beaten to death with an English cucumber?” I says.
“Nope.”
“Well, you call me old timer again and you’ll be wondering how to remove one from yer ear, Pilgrim.” “We only got domestic cucumbers” he laughs.
“Son, 80,000 unemployed comedians out there and here you are trying to be funny”.
I retrieved one of the two foot knobby green legumes from my bags and waived it under his nose close enough to hair lip him. “Stand and Deliver!” . And lo and behold, he did.
On to the homestead without further incident, and then rubbed and glazed that pork belly with SB Original and Hogwaller and let it ride for 3 days. Then seared it to seal it and hickory smoked it for 8 hours, with a finishing glaze in the last hour. You fellows are best equipped to judge it.
Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Moderator: TBBQF Deputies
- Boots
- Wordsmith
- Posts: 4578
- Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 12:16 pm
- Location: McKinney, Texas, USA!
- Contact:
Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Last edited by Boots on Sat Apr 10, 2021 9:41 am, edited 3 times in total.
BE WELL, BUT NOT DONE
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
- bsooner75
- High Plains Smoker
- Posts: 8348
- Joined: Mon Jan 16, 2012 5:34 pm
- Location: Little Elm, TX
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Beautiful belly and nice story Boots! Happy New Year
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
- OldUsedParts
- Deputy
- Posts: 20755
- Joined: Sun May 15, 2011 7:09 pm
- Location: Montgomery, Texas
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Awesome "SMITHING" Captn. BOOTS - - - - you never lay one down that doesn't create nose and lip wrinkles.
I'll be back later to survey the damage, er uh Cookin, but no doubt it'll make the wrinkles water.
I'll be back later to survey the damage, er uh Cookin, but no doubt it'll make the wrinkles water.
I am determined to sustain myself as long as possible & die like a soldier who never forgets what is due to his own honor & that of his country—Victory or Death. William Barret Travis - Lt. Col. comdt "The Alamo"
- Papa Tom
- Deputy
- Posts: 6223
- Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2007 9:40 am
- Location: Oak Point, TX
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Great looking cook Boots buuuuuuut you lost me @ '59 Ford flathead.... ( they went OHV in '54 ) Admittedly I doubt that the chickens knew that back then but possibly knew the truck could be loaded with 1959 cranberries ...
tarde venientibus ossa....
- Norway Joe
- Chuck Wagon
- Posts: 4396
- Joined: Mon Jun 04, 2018 2:04 pm
- Location: Oslo, Norway
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Beautiful belly there. And a cool story.
Sent fra min SM-G988B via Tapatalk
Sent fra min SM-G988B via Tapatalk
Instagram: Norway_joe1
- OldUsedParts
- Deputy
- Posts: 20755
- Joined: Sun May 15, 2011 7:09 pm
- Location: Montgomery, Texas
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Papa Tom wrote:Great looking cook Boots buuuuuuut you lost me @ '59 Ford flathead.... ( they went OHV in '54 ) Admittedly I doubt that the chickens knew that back then but possibly knew the truck could be loaded with 1959 cranberries ...
PSSSSTTT:
chickens out in front of a ‘59 Ford flatbed with no brakes
I am determined to sustain myself as long as possible & die like a soldier who never forgets what is due to his own honor & that of his country—Victory or Death. William Barret Travis - Lt. Col. comdt "The Alamo"
- Papa Tom
- Deputy
- Posts: 6223
- Joined: Sat Jun 30, 2007 9:40 am
- Location: Oak Point, TX
- Contact:
- Boots
- Wordsmith
- Posts: 4578
- Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 12:16 pm
- Location: McKinney, Texas, USA!
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
The Flathead woulda been driving the Flatbed of course ! In ‘59 most guys woulda had a flat top haircut. My Dads was so flat birds could shoot carrier landings on it.
Class of '59
Flatop with DA's
Class of '59
Flatop with DA's
BE WELL, BUT NOT DONE
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
- Hj
- Rustler
- Posts: 105
- Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2009 10:21 pm
- Location: Arizona
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Oh my golly, that is making me drool. Really a beautiful piece of pork belly. I could snack on that a long time
A mistake is sometimes a great creation
- Boots
- Wordsmith
- Posts: 4578
- Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2011 12:16 pm
- Location: McKinney, Texas, USA!
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
Hehehe. We did. My wife never wanted to eat pork before. This is one of the ways I’ve “converted” her.
BE WELL, BUT NOT DONE
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
Hank: "Do you know how to jumpstart a man's heart with a downed power line?"
Bobby: "No."
Hank: "Well, there's really no wrong way to do it."
- Timothy_W
- Pilgrim
- Posts: 41
- Joined: Fri Oct 02, 2020 11:31 am
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
The breast looks great! What kind of fool doesn't like juicy roasted meat? I have already opened the barbecue season, tried out my new gas grill Weber Spirit E-210 46110001. Found this model in this article https://mykitchenadvisor.com/gas-grills-under-500/ and was very pleased. The grill keeps the temperature cool, the meat bakes wonderfully. Anyway, I've heard that Weber grills are some of the best.
- Hj
- Rustler
- Posts: 105
- Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2009 10:21 pm
- Location: Arizona
- Contact:
Re: Smokin Pig From Outta Space
BOOTS. ..
Every time I see ñ think of UR amazing Smoking Pig from Outer Space of pork belly ..I want to adopt you ñ UR family....so you could make this for me!
U SHOULD SELL THIS ON QVC. I'll take 1% of the sales for suggesting it to U!! SERIOUSLY what an income it would be. in fact ..some of all U Great cooks should think about selling UR great grilling!
LOL. BETTER ñ cheaper yet ....Just cook me one yearly. I'm drooling darl'n! Amazing. Happy Holidays to all!
Would be good in mesquite wood or Applewood also
Every time I see ñ think of UR amazing Smoking Pig from Outer Space of pork belly ..I want to adopt you ñ UR family....so you could make this for me!
U SHOULD SELL THIS ON QVC. I'll take 1% of the sales for suggesting it to U!! SERIOUSLY what an income it would be. in fact ..some of all U Great cooks should think about selling UR great grilling!
LOL. BETTER ñ cheaper yet ....Just cook me one yearly. I'm drooling darl'n! Amazing. Happy Holidays to all!
Would be good in mesquite wood or Applewood also
A mistake is sometimes a great creation
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests